A young person talking to a trusted adult outside on a bench.

Talking therapy

What is talking therapy?

Talking therapy can help you make sense of your thoughts, feelings and behaviours. It offers a safe space to meet with a professional, work through something you’re struggling with, and learn coping skills.

Therapy can help with a specific mental health problem. But you don’t need a diagnosis or even a specific ‘problem’ to get a lot out of sessions. Sometimes it just helps to talk to someone who listens without judgment.

You might hear terms like counselling, therapy, cognitive behavioural therapy and psychotherapy. These are all different types of talking therapy that help people understand their problems in different ways. The type of support you get will depend on:

  • why you’re going to therapy
  • whether it’s one-on-one, family, couples or group therapy
  • how long you will need support for
  • what type of therapy suits you best

Even though the names are different, all therapy types are about helping you feel better, no matter what you’re dealing with.

Therapy helps everyone differently, as each person has their own unique mental health challenges. No issue is too big or small – if it's hard for you then it's worth talking about.

If talking to family or friends feels tough, a therapist can offer support, help you understand your struggles, and find practical solutions like managing anxiety.

We asked young people how therapy helped them and what surprised them. Here’s what they said:

  • “It changed the way I see situations.”
  • “It made me think about other people in the picture.”
  • “It’s challenging, and more hard work than a quick fix.”
  • “It’s okay to need counselling/therapy at a young age.”
  • “It helped me be at peace with the past and who I am now.”
  • “It helped me to communicate better and empathise with others.”
  • “It helped me realise that I do matter, and I am worth something.”
Two young people sitting in the grass together.
I spoke with my counsellor about my struggles with anxiety and low moods. She made me feel like I had a safe space to share my pain. I was really lucky that she took the time to understand my struggles and what I was going through.
Therapy helped me to gain a better understanding about how I was feeling and it allowed me to learn how to cope with my emotions without getting overwhelmed by them.
Laura

Common types of talking therapy

There are lots of different types of therapy. It can get confusing, so we’ve outlined some common types below to help you understand them.

CBT is a talking therapy. It helps you understand the relationship between the way that you think, feel and behave and how this relates to negative feelings. CBT is practical, so your therapist will give you things to try out and share how you found them. The aim is to apply the skills you’re learning to your daily life and help you deal with different problems. As well as treating depression and anxiety, CBT is used for many mental health conditions, like:

Usually, CBT courses last between five and 20 sessions.

Behavioural activation is a talking therapy that helps people with depression and anxiety. You’ll learn problem-solving skills that motivate you to make positive changes and help you to enjoy life again. It can be one-to-one, in a group, or online, with regular check-ins with your therapist. Behavioural activation is sometimes used together with CBT.

Usually, it lasts around six to 16 sessions.

MBCT has two parts: mindfulness techniques (like meditation and breathing exercises) and cognitive therapy. The aim is to help you handle your thoughts and feelings better and stay present in the moment. It’s often used to prevent depression from coming back and manage some types of anxiety and stress.

Like CBT, DBT looks at how our behaviour is linked to how we feel. But DBT is designed for people who feel emotions very intensely and struggle to manage them, which can lead to impulsive or risky behaviour. DBT teaches “emotional self-regulation”. This means managing your emotions in a safe way using practical techniques.
DBT usually involves weekly one-to-one and group sessions. You’ll work with your therapist and others to spot unhelpful behaviours, learn coping skills, and make positive changes.

While DBT is often used for borderline personality disorder (BPD), it can also help with:

IPT focuses on improving your relationships to support your mental health. You’ll look at your relationships with friends, family and partners, figure out what difficulties you face, and work on solutions. It’s based on the idea that if you have difficult relationships with people, it can leave you feeling depressed. And when you're depressed, it can make those relationships even harder. It’s usually recommended if other treatments haven’t worked.

A course of IPT lasts between 16 and 20 sessions.

EMDR helps you process distressing memories and is often used for post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). It involves repeating side-to-side eye movements that help the brain ‘file away’ traumatic memories to the correct part of the brain. By doing this, the trauma no longer feels like it’s happening in the present. Distressing symptoms like flashbacks and anxiety reduce or stop all together.

A course of EMDR usually lasts between eight and 12 sessions.

Creative therapies like art, music or drama help you express tough feelings through creativity. It’s done in groups or on your own. You’ll use creative activities to explore your emotions and then talk about them.

A young person laughing with her friends.
Finding clarity in your thoughts can often be difficult using words alone, so creative therapy can help you to communicate your inner experience and what you’re feeling in other ways.

If you’re not sure where to start, speak to your GP. They can suggest what they think is best. If you don’t like it, it’s okay to ask about trying another type. That doesn’t make you difficult – it’s about finding what works for you.

How to speak to your GP

What happens during therapy sessions?

In your first session, your therapist will explain what to expect from therapy, like:

  • how many sessions you’ll have
  • how they can help you
  • what to do if you miss a session

It’s also a good time to ask questions and get to know your therapist, like:

  • what type of therapy they give
  • their background and qualifications
  • whether they’ll tell anyone else what you tell them

You can also talk about any accessibility needs you have and any worries you have about therapy.

The first session was the scariest, I had so many questions racing through my mind: would I get along with my therapist? Could she really talk to me without judgement? Am I in control of the session? The answer to all of these was yes! The first step into therapy is often the hardest but, for me, it was the most rewarding.
Eleanor, 18

The length and frequency of your therapy sessions will depend on the type you’re doing. Sessions usually last around 50 minutes and happen either weekly or every couple of weeks. You can chat with your therapist in person, on the phone, or online.

In sessions, your therapist might ask you about:

  • past experiences
  • family, friendships and other relationships
  • things that are difficult right now
  • how you feel and behave

Be honest with them, but if you’re not ready to share something, that’s okay. You don’t have to talk about anything you’re not ready to.

A therapist won’t push you to talk about something that makes you feel uncomfortable – you only have to talk about things that YOU want to talk about. And just as you can do in a regular situation, you can say you’re uncomfortable with the topic and move on.
Caitlin

What you say in therapy is private – it’s just between you and your therapist. We call this “confidentiality”. If your therapist works as part of a team, they may share your progress and ask other professionals for suggestions. But the details of your sessions will never be discussed in depth with others, or outside of the team.

However, there are times when your therapist may have to share information with others to keep you safe. For example, if your therapist thinks that either you or someone else is in danger, they might need to inform someone, like a teacher or the emergency services. If they can, your therapist will let you know that they plan to do this beforehand.

Your therapist will also chat with a supervisor who helps them support you better, but that’s also confidential. During a therapist’s supervision, they will not use your name, so you remain anonymous.

In group therapy, they’ll go over confidentiality rules at the start.

Therapy or counselling can bring up hard emotions. That’s usually a sign you’re working through something important. There’s no ‘right’ way to feel, but you should always feel safe and supported.

If you feel your sessions aren’t working for you, let your therapist know so they can adjust things. If things don’t improve, check out our tips on what to do if you’re not happy with your therapist.

Here are some common feelings that might come up and what you can do:

Overwhelmed or drained: If it’s all feeling too much, tell your therapist and take a break if you need it. You could also plan in some time for self-care after sessions.

Guilt or shame about going to therapy: You might worry your problem isn’t ‘big enough’ or that others might not get why you’re going to therapy. But whatever you’re dealing with deserves support. Let your therapist know if this feeling is bothering you.

Getting attached to your therapist: It’s normal to feel close to your therapist. It shows you’re engaged and work well together, but if the feeling gets intense, talk to them. They’re there to help.

Worried about ending therapy or changing therapists: Change happens, whether it’s switching therapists, life changes, or transitioning to adult services. It’s normal to have mixed feelings about it. Talking to your therapist can help - they’ll understand and won’t be offended.

A young Black woman in a wheelchair talking to a young Black man on a bench in the park. The woman is laughing while the man explains something.
They might only be in your life for a short time, but it’s about what you take from that time. It’s always helped me to think of what each therapist taught me.
The clasped hands of two people talking seriously.
Everyday life is so hectic and fast-paced that we could all do with a weekly space where we stop and reflect on how we are doing, really.

How to make the most of therapy sessions

  • Know what you want from therapy

    Some people know what they want from therapy and like to share this with their therapist. But some people don’t, and that’s okay. You can set some goals together with your therapist, like: handling stress and anxiety, coping with trauma, dealing with big emotions, boosting self-confidence, exploring gender or sexuality.

  • Tell your therapist what works for you

    Need a different approach or more time to go over something? Let them know or drop them an email. It’s your therapy, so it should fit your needs.

  • Make the space comfy

    Bring something calming, like a fidget toy, or ask to adjust the lighting, temperature, or where you sit. If it’s not in person, pick a private spot where you feel safe.

  • Write a journal

    Write down your thoughts before and after sessions. You can bring notes to sessions to help guide the conversation.

  • Record your sessions

    Listening back can help you remember and process sessions. Not all therapists will agree to this, but if it’s something that you’d like to do, just ask.

  • Plan after-care

    Therapy can be a lot, so plan something calming for after your session. Meet a friend, relax, or take a breather before getting on with your day.

At the time I was told to keep therapy a secret, but now I am proud to say I have been in therapy for the last eight years. This is where I started to learn who I really was, where my issues were and not necessarily how to get rid of them, but how to cope with them and embrace them.
Danny

How to access talking therapy

Taking the first step to get help for your mental health can feel overwhelming, but there are options available to support you. Here are some routes that might work for you.

If you’re thinking about getting therapy, start by talking to your GP. They can guide you on local services and how to access them.

Get more advice on speaking to your GP

If you’re 18+ in England, you can self-refer for NHS psychological therapies without a doctor. For more info, visit the NHS website.

If you’re under 18, you can access psychological therapies on the NHS through Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services (CAMHS).

Read our guide to CAMHS

Hub of Hope is a database of local mental health support categorised by what you’re struggling with. Use their website to find the right support for you.

If you can pay, private counselling or therapy is an option. Costs vary by therapist, type of therapy, and location. Private therapy can be very expensive, although some therapists do offer reduced-cost sessions, like discounts for students, low earners, or unemployed. If you or the person who cares for you has a private health insurance plan, this might cover the cost of sessions. Always confirm costs with your therapist before you get started.

You can search for therapists specialising in young people or specific conditions or problems. Make sure any therapist is fully qualified and registered with a professional body, like:

Many schools, colleges and universities offer free counselling or therapy. Speak to a teacher or student welfare officer to see what’s available.

On a waiting list?

Waiting times can be long, but you’re doing the right thing by getting help. While you wait, our mental health guides can help. There are also lots of helplines and services you can contact. This isn’t to replace the support you’re waiting for, but to take care of yourself while you wait.

If things change or get worse, contact the service you were referred to. If you need urgent help, find out who to contact on our urgent help page.

Finding the right therapist for you

It’s normal to have concerns about your therapist, like:

  • feeling judged, misunderstood or treated unfairly
  • having to explain your beliefs or culture
  • getting advice that isn’t right for you
  • feeling like you can’t be fully open
  • worrying you might feel worse

Mental health professionals are trained to be non-judgemental and open-minded, so you shouldn’t need to worry about feeling judged. It's always worth giving it a go.

Remember that building trust takes time. If you’re not happy with your therapist or you feel uncomfortable, talk to them about it. It’s their job to help.

If you’ve given this a try and your therapist really isn’t working for you, it’s okay to look for another therapist. Therapy is very personal, so you might prefer someone who just understands you better, or perhaps you’re looking for someone who shares your identity, gender or cultural background.

You can’t always pick your therapist, but you can ask your GP or CAMHS for other options. If private therapy is an option for you, you’ll have more choice.

If you ever feel unsafe or stressed in sessions, stop going and tell someone you trust.

Making a complaint about your therapist

If you feel unfairly treated, you or someone you trust can complain by speaking to someone in person or writing a letter or email. Here’s what you can do:

  • Talk it out

    If you don’t want to make a formal complaint, chat to a trusted adult, family member, GP or CAMHS staff. They can give you advice and support, and help you decide what to do next.

  • Get support

    To get help with making a complaint, you can:

    You can also ask for help from your GP, CAMHS staff or a trusted adult.

  • Know where to go

    Ask someone in administration, like a receptionist, for more advice about where your complaint will go. The gov.uk website can also guide you on where to send it.

  • Take it further

    If you're unhappy with the response, contact the Parliamentary and Health Service Ombudsman. If nothing works, write to your local MP who can complain on your behalf.

Get help now

  • Childline

    If you’re under 19 you can confidentially call, chat online or email about any problem big or small.

    Sign up for a free Childline locker (real name or email address not needed) to use their free 1-2-1 counsellor chat and email support service.

    Can provide a BSL interpreter if you are deaf or hearing-impaired.

    Hosts online message boards where you can share your experiences, have fun and get support from other young people in similar situations.

    Opening times:
    24/7
  • Muslim Youth Helpline

    Provides faith and culturally sensitive support for young Muslims. 

    Online chat service available during opening hours.

    Opening times:
    4pm - 10pm, 365 days a year
  • Youth Access

    Provides information about local counselling and advice services for young people aged 11-25.

    Put in your location and what you need help with into their 'Find help' search, and see what services are available in your area.

  • Pink Therapy

    Provides an online directory of therapists who work with gender and sexual diversity clients across the LGBTQ+ spectrum from a non-judgmental standpoint.

    Search the directory.

  • BAATN (The Black, African and Asian Therapy Network)

    A directory of accredited therapists and services with expertise in working with African, Caribbean and South Asian experiences.

  • Hub of Hope

    A national database of mental health charities and organisations across Britain that offer mental health advice, including for family members.

Patient Information Forum Trusted Information Creator (PIF TICK) logo

This page was reviewed in January 2025.

It was co-created with young people with lived experience of counselling and therapy.

We will next review the page in 2028.

YoungMinds is a proud member of PIF TICK – the UK's quality mark for trusted health information.

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