How I stopped blaming myself for my mental health

Topics mentioned: reaching out for help, self-care, self-esteem

About: Struggling with your mental health is never your fault. Josephine, 24, shares her advice on practising self-compassion and challenging your inner critic.

It’s not always easy to talk about mental health and it can be difficult to understand why we are struggling. Self-blame is a common issue for lots of young people struggling with mental health. Self-blame can lead to feelings of isolation and helplessness, so it's important to reach out for help and support when needed.

We often feel that no one understands us. But the truth is, we are never alone in this journey and there is always someone out there to support us.

I have been struggling with my mental health issues for many years. It has been an ongoing battle between me and my inner critic that keeps telling me I am not good enough, I will not get better and it is all my fault.

One day, I decided to take a step back and take a look at the progress I have made. Instead of saying, “why am I not over this?” I told myself – “Look how far you’ve come. Even if it is just small steps, they all add up!”

This gave me a newfound motivation to continue my journey towards recovery and I started taking small steps every day to make progress – whether it be opening up to my loved ones about my mental health, writing in journals or going for walks with my dogs.

Soon enough, these small steps began adding up and my progress became greater over time. They have helped lessen the guilt I once felt. My inner critic is slowly melting away and with each milestone achieved, I feel more empowered than ever before.

Something that has helped me on my journey to self-compassion is practice! Practising self-compassion can help us recognise that we are not alone in our struggles and provide us with the tools we need to cope with them.

One of the best ways to practise self-compassion is through mindfulness. Even a quick exercise, such as meditating for a few minutes, can be a great way to nurture and accept ourselves in the present moment. By being mindful of our thoughts and feelings without judgement, we can learn to embrace our imperfections and show ourselves kindness.

Another tip to practise self-compassion is to treat yourself like you would treat a friend. When you're feeling down, ask yourself: "What would I say if my friend was struggling with their mental health?"

Would you be so hard on them? Most likely not! We are often much more forgiving and compassionate with our friends than we are with ourselves. So the next time you find yourself in a difficult situation, take a moment to practise self-compassion and treat yourself like you would treat your friend.

It’s important to remember that it is not your fault for struggling with mental health issues. You should not blame yourself for difficult emotions as they are often caused by things that are beyond our control.

Sometimes how you feel is just a natural response to a difficult situation. It's important to reach out and get help from family, friends or professionals who can provide guidance and support.