Topics mentioned: dyspraxia, problems at school
About: From misdiagnosis to getting the right support at school, Lydia shares her experience of dyspraxia and mental health, and how she overcame the challenges.
It’s been really hard, being dyspraxic.
A lot of people will look at that word and say, ‘what’s that?’, ‘don’t you mean dyslexia?’ or ‘doesn’t that make you clumsy?’ There isn’t as much support or understanding out there for dyspraxia as there should be, and as a young dyspraxic person, I’m determined to change that. Getting through my education with dyspraxia has been hard, but with the right support I’ve been able to achieve a lot. I hope reading about my experience can help you to get support and be proud of your achievements too.
Dyspraxia, also known as DCD, is a type of neurodiversity that affects how the brain processes things and how it communicates with the body. It causes difficulties with auditory processing, balance, coordination, muscle tone, fine motor skills, spatial awareness, sensory issues, concentration issues, emotional regulation and more. It also increases the likelihood of depression, anxiety and low self-esteem.
My experience of dyspraxia at primary school
I was an anxious, clumsy and nerdy child. I always had my head in a book. Sometimes I found it difficult to make friends with other kids. I had low self-esteem despite having wonderful parents who did their best for me.
My teachers mixed up dyslexia and dyspraxia. They didn’t understand what it was and were confused about why I could excel at English and Maths, but struggle to put my uniform back on after PE. I always felt as though I was weird and different, and I hated it.
Then at the age of ten, I received a formal diagnosis of dyspraxia. The person who diagnosed me was shocked that the school hadn’t picked up on it sooner, as I was a textbook case. It felt good being able to explain all these things about me, and knowing I’m not alone.
Access arrangements at secondary school
Secondary school was still tricky, but with my diagnosis, the support I got there was better. I was given rest breaks, a laptop to help with my handwriting, and 25% extra time on exams. I struggled at times to focus in class and would often be tempted to make sarcastic or silly remarks in the classroom. But thanks to the support from the SEN department, I managed to come out with GCSE results that I’m proud of, plus a Distinction in Spoken Language and a Service to the School Award. I am very grateful for this support.
Additional Learning Support at college
At college, I was able to access an Additional Learning Support (ALS) helper, and I could use the ALS room to do work and chill out. My ALS Helper and my Ancient History tutor helped me organise my folders of Ancient History Notes (of which there were many). I was also given flexibility, and allowed to go on study leave a week or two earlier than my peers. This helped, as did 25% extra time and access to a Word Processor, and I came out with an A in English Literature, a B in Ancient History, a pass in French and an unconditional uni offer.
Recognise that it’s okay to ask for help. I know that it can be embarrassing sometimes, but it’s worth it. It’s better than not being able to do something at all.
University so far
It’s important at uni to communicate your needs, otherwise they can’t help you. Before starting uni, I had to send documents to prove I had an official diagnosis of dyspraxia. I was then able to access additional support. They set up an Inclusive Learning Plan for me, which meant I could loan books for longer and have extended deadlines. I’ve also spoken to the pastoral team who’ve been really useful.
The practical side of university has definitely been the trickiest part for me. Chores, such as cleaning and cooking, are difficult and exhausting for dyspraxic people. But I’m determined to be able to cook proper meals for myself and do my own laundry. I have an amazing support network of friends, family, pastoral support and my partner. I couldn’t be more grateful for them.
Tips and advice for anyone who is dyspraxic
My advice to anyone who is dyspraxic is to keep going. Dyspraxic people tend to get fatigued and frustrated easily, so giving up can sometimes feel like the only option. But it isn’t. If you’re as determined and stubborn as I’ve been, you’ll find a way. Here are some tips to help:
Sleep can really impact how well you function in day-to-day life, especially if you struggle with fatigue. Try to go to bed at the same time each night, taking into account what time you need to get up. For example, I know I usually need 10 hours of sleep due to my fatigue. So, if I have something at 9am online, I get up at 8am. That means I start getting ready for bed around 9pm and go to bed at 10pm.
Therapy or alternatives like positive affirmations (this helped me) can change the way you think and feel about yourself. This will inform your approach to daily life. Believing in yourself is so important and can help you to achieve your goals, however big or small.
I know that it can be embarrassing sometimes, but it’s worth it. It’s better than not being able to do something at all.
It’s okay if you can’t do everything that you’d like to do. Dyspraxia is considered a disability under the 2010 Equality Act for a reason.
…and think about what you want to do and how to do it. Then, set out and achieve it. This might look like creating a dream board, writing down some goals for the next few months, the next year or the next five years. Think about where you want to be, and work back from there.
I used to hate my dyspraxia, but I wouldn’t be where I am today without it. It’s not my superpower, but I’ve learned to start working with it, and not around it, and to use it as a means to help others, like writing this blog. I hope my advice helps you too.
My advice to anyone who is dyspraxic is to keep going. Dyspraxic people tend to get fatigued and frustrated easily, so giving up can sometimes feel like the only option. But it isn’t.
More information and advice
We have tips and advice to help you find the support you need. Take a look at our guides.
Read more blogs by young people
Where to get help
However you're feeling, there are people who can help you if you are struggling. Here are some services that can support you.
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Childline
If you’re under 19 you can confidentially call, chat online or email about any problem big or small.
Sign up for a free Childline locker (real name or email address not needed) to use their free 1-2-1 counsellor chat and email support service.
Can provide a BSL interpreter if you are deaf or hearing-impaired.
Hosts online message boards where you can share your experiences, have fun and get support from other young people in similar situations.
- Opening times:
- 24/7
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Youth Access
Provides information about local counselling and advice services for young people aged 11-25.
Put in your location and what you need help with into their 'Find help' search, and see what services are available in your area.
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Samaritans
Whatever you're going through, you can contact the Samaritans for support. N.B. This is a listening service and does not offer advice or intervention.
- Opening times:
- 24/7