A guide for young people Anorexia

If someone opens up to you, that’s a sign that they trust you. And by listening to their concerns without judgement, you’re already providing valuable support. It can be tough to hear someone talk about themselves in this way, but try not to advise or criticise. Tell them you're glad they opened up and that you're here for them – no need to have all the answers.

Let them know their experience is valid and acknowledge that what they’re going through is tough. Instead of making assumptions or trying to interpret their behaviour, ask them how they’re feeling and what they’re thinking.

It's okay to feel frustrated, but patience goes a long way. Don't push for change. It might take time for them to accept they’re struggling with anorexia and need to seek help.

Ask them what support they’d like from you. This could be going with them to a doctor’s appointment, finding helpful resources or supporting them at mealtimes. They may have a preferred way of speaking about anorexia, like referring to it as a third person. This can help you both recognise anorexia as separate to your relationship and know that no one is to blame.

Encourage them to speak to an adult they trust, like a relative, carer, teacher or counsellor.

You can also advise them to speak to a doctor for professional help. They might not want to but it’s important to try because seeking help is a crucial step towards recovery. If they refuse to see a doctor, you could suggest they contact a helpline instead.

They might not want to join in group activities, but keep asking them and stay in touch. This will reassure them that you’re there and remind them that you value their friendship. Try arranging activities that don’t involve food or exercise, like playing a game, watching your favourite film or series, or arts and crafts.

It’s important to avoid discussing weight, body shape, food or diets. This can trigger difficult emotions for them. Try not to focus or comment on their appearance – how someone looks on the outside doesn’t always reflect how they feel inside.