Anorexia - Recovery is Possible

Anorexia - Recovery is Possible

Running up to Eating Disorder Awareness Week, guest blogger Hope Virgo shares her experience of battling with and recovering from anorexia.

Anorexia - Recovery is Possible

Running up to Eating Disorder Awareness Week, guest blogger Hope Virgo shares her experience of battling with and recovering from anorexia.

When I was younger, I thought I had discovered something that was just for me. Something that gave me hope and reassurance when life felt tough. No one else knew about it. I thought it could teach me everything I needed to know and could make me feel good about myself. That something was anorexia.

But in reality it couldn’t. In reality, it sucked me in to a manipulative game.

I didn’t realise its game until it was nearly too late. Until I was stood in a mental health hospital doorway being admitted to live for a year or I would die of heart failure. As I stood in that doorway I was still in complete denial that something was wrong and I didn’t realise I was about to embark on one of the toughest and most challenging years of my life to kick anorexia out of my life!
Hope

Anorexia is a scarily secret disease. It grips you so tight you feel no way out. You begin to doubt everyone round you. You believe that people are out to get you. Out to make you fat. And out to destroy that relationship that you cherish so much. A relationship with something that would do everything for you and you would do everything for.

I used to be there. I was sucked deep into its grip and I put all my trust in to it. 

Recovery

Wherever you are you I want to tell you a few things. A few things that you will find hard to believe but you must try to trust me:

  • Support is available: It is scary asking for support. I know that. You don’t want people to interfere who make you fat. But they won’t. They just want to help. 
  • It is well worth the fight: I can stand here and tell you that now. I have come through the other side and I can confidently tell you just this.    
  • Take each day at a time and set yourself some achievable goals: This is tough but it is a good thing to do. This year I made a list of food that I used to like but had stopped myself eating because of my anorexia. If I am honest there are foods on that list that terrify me still, but I think pushing your boundaries wherever you are in your recovery is key. Learning that the fight is worth it and other relationships are much more important to you.   
  • Recovery is possible: It isn’t easy. I know that. I have been there, battled to get well. Battled with the initial weight gain and it was terrifying. I have days now when I wake up and look in the mirror and see a whale like figure staring back. But it is so so worth fighting. Each day gets easier. I guarantee you that. 
And trust me when I say it recovery is possible.
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